What I've Learned About Myself from the Mark Driscoll Affair
In 2008 I was in a pretty bad place. I had been dating a girl for over two years, knowing that the relationship was not up to God's standards. I had managed to break it off for a couple weeks in August of 2008, but went running back. To be clear, the girl was a wonderful person and a good friend. But the relationship was sinful. And it had been for quite some time.
I had also been out of college for a couple years. I had taught English for during that time and was just entering my third school year as a teacher. All of my teaching jobs at this point had been long-term substitute, so I had never had a classroom longer than one academic year. I had also discovered that teaching wasn't really for me, but what else could I do? (The answer is: a lot. There was a lot I could have been doing differently)
So going into the fall of 2008 I was pretty miserable. I was far from God. I didn't know what to do with my life. I was in an unGodly dating relationship. So despite the Phillies being on their way to a World Series win, life was pretty empty.
Then Mark Driscoll began his sermon series on Song of Solomon, titled, "The Peasant Princess." I had been interested in Driscoll for some time and had listened to him on and off. I don't think I had yet read any of his books, but had certainly seen posts or articles from him.
God used this sermon series to pull me out of darkness and bring me to light.
Driscoll's teaching, as always, was blunt. As a pretty pathetic twenty-something male living at mommy and daddy's house, his words often cut. But it was a good cut. Like popping a blister or removing a splinter. It hurts, but you know, you know, that once it's done the healing can begin. I studied a book of the Bible like I had never done before as Pastor Mark went through a text I was unfamiliar with. Part of this series included him and his wife taking the stage at the end of message and answering questions via text and email that came in during the message. One question was eerily familiar.
Someone explained that he had been in a dating relationship for some time and that he was having a sexual relationship with the girl and he was unable to stop. He didn't see a future with the girl because he believed they were unable to be Christlike. What should he do?
Pastor Mark's response: Break up.
Blunt. Cutting. Correct.
What could I say to this? It's pretty sound advice for a situation I found myself in. With this teaching in mind, shortly thereafter I broke off my relationship. That was late January 2009. Shortly after I applied to graduate school to earn a degree working in higher education, an idea I had been kicking around for a couple years, but never found the courage to do. My post-college depression was finally ending after nearly three years.
I didn't realize it at the time, but I gave a little too much credit to Mark Driscoll and not enough credit to God. I wouldn't say that God worked in my life, I would say Pastor Mark did. So instead of worshiping God that much more for pursuing me, I placed Pastor Mark on a pedestal. One pretty high up
So I defended Pastor Mark in everything. He's overly aggressive? Some don't respond to subtlety. He needs to stop screaming? Sometimes that's the only way people will hear. He's offensive? Hey, truth hurts. And while I still see most of his methods as being acceptable, they do tend to lead to something not often acknowledged enough in our society: pride.
Once pride enters the scene anything can happen. Because pride takes down the first few lines of defense against Satan. First, we ignore John the Baptist's example of lessening ourselves and exalting Christ. And Second, we trust ourselves over those around us who are to hold us accountable. If we listen to ourselves instead of God, if we listen to ourselves instead of God's word, if we listen to ourselves instead of our brothers and sisters in Christ, Satan has us exactly where he wants us: Looking inward instead of Heavenward.
So now here we are. For the past decade or so most people have been trying to do one of three things in response to Driscoll: 1) Take him down, 2) Warn him, or 3) Defend him at all costs.
The first camp are made up mostly of atheists or very liberal Christians. Being based in Seattle, Driscoll had more than a few people trying to take him down. For them, it wasn't just Pastor Mark they were opposed to, they were opposed to Christ.
I fell into the third camp. I defended Pastor Mark against all criticism. And while I thought I was just defending him from the first group of people, I was also ignoring the second group.
You see, the second group had it right. They weren't trying to destroy him. They were trying to rebuke him in a loving way. It wasn't his teachings that were wrong, it was him. You see, as difficult as it may be for 2008 Tony to realize, Driscoll is a sinful man like any of us. Even if he leads thousands to Christ, he needs God's grace as much as anyone. And those loving warnings over the years were drowned out until they were screaming sirens. And much like leaving the dead battery in the smoke detector, once the fire engine sirens wake you, it might be too late.
For Pastor Mark it's not too late. He's decided to step away for six weeks and let the board review charges against him. In addition, Paul Tripp has given a very loving, but very direct insight of the culture of Mars Hill leadership that will hopefully go a long way to help resolving the situation. This will only work, though, if the elders seek God in all of this. Because showing love to Mars Hill Church, to the Church, and to Pastor Mark may not look like love. It may require Pastor Mark stepping away for a longer time period. In fact, a "leaked" letter suggests this might be the right course of action.
Meanwhile, I've learned a couple things about myself.
First, I'm the kind of guy who places others on pedestals regularly. Whether it's Rand Paul, Matt Walsh, Paul Tripp, or someone else, I get excited about someone and what they stand for, and then they can do no wrong. I start reading their op-eds before I read the Bible. I look at their blog posts before I read Biblical commentary. I listen to their podcasts before I pray. And while these individuals may express great ideas and be solid role models, a pedestal is a terrible place to put them. They are not infallible. I need to be wary of celebrity Christians. Fame, like money, isn't a bad thing. Neither are evil. But once you start seeking them them instead of seeking Christ, humility is out and pride is in. I don't know how many of our celebrity pastors sought out fame and how many had fame thrusted upon them while trying to glorify Christ. But in our age it's so much easier to be famous for anything, that it's a lot more tempting to use the pulpit to increase oneself instead of Christ. You can almost track history based on individuals who are renowned for preaching the gospel.
16th century: Calvin, Luther, Simons, and Ignatius
17th century: Arminius and Fox
18th century: Edwards, Wesley, and Whitfield
19th century: Hodge, Kierkegaard, and Spurgeon
20th century (early to mid): Chesterton, Lewis, Graham, and Packer
Yet we then come to the late 20th century through today. A time when the internet and social media allows individuals to share every idea they ever had with the entire world in a split second. And while this allows us to share the gospel in new ways with countless people, it also creates celebrities out of people meant to be vessels.
After you read this sentence, close your eyes and take ten seconds to rattle off all the preachers/theologians you can think of...
Here's who I came up with: Piper, Driscoll, Chan, Chandler, DeYoung, Platt, Groeschel, Stanley, Hybels, Warren, Bell, McKinley, Carson, Keller, Mohler, Tripp, Sproul...
See my point? These are folks from just the past 15 years who have gained followings for preaching the gospel (or something resembling the gospel in Bell's case). It's great to base a career of of preaching the Good News, but should someone be rich and famous for doing so? The matter of wealth will have to be reconciled between God and that individual, and I think the matter of fame will be as well. Because only God and that individual knows the heart, and if the heart is proclaiming the Gospel to glorify God's kingdom or to receive something in return. And again, it's not that I think these individuals above entered ministry for any reason other than to glorify God, but after the kudos and dollars start rolling in, it has to be difficult to not enjoy it too much.
The second thing I've learned about myself is that I'm very prideful. You see I have listened to Pastor Mark's sermons, so I know his heart better than you. Whatever you say isn't as informed or as smart as what I say.
Scary stuff. Over the past few weeks I've been discussing Calvinism, specifically the book Five Points by John Piper, through email and facebook with friends. I don't really buy the whole Calvinism thing. Then again I don't really buy the whole Arminianism thing either. Still, I think I've had a few good counterarguments and questions to what I've read, but I've realized I've been demonstrating pride and arrogance in how I've been responding. It's hard to seek God when I'm looking at myself.
I should make sure that I listen when people whom I know love God with all their heart have something to say that differs from what I think. I might still disagree, but instead of speaking over them or planning my next rebuttal, I need to hear what they have to say. And of course, hold it up against God's word.
I still love Mark Driscoll and will continue reading his books and listening to old messages I never got around to. He's incredibly knowledgable and I believe he deeply loves Christ. If things were as bad as many said it was, he needs to take an extended break from vocational ministry. I hope he spends time with his family, reads books, builds a house in an impoverished country, picks up a new hobby, and prays for a deeper love of Christ and a deeper love of people. Maybe I'm just protecting him again at all costs, but I truly hope we see more of him in the future. And through that, we see more of Him.
I had also been out of college for a couple years. I had taught English for during that time and was just entering my third school year as a teacher. All of my teaching jobs at this point had been long-term substitute, so I had never had a classroom longer than one academic year. I had also discovered that teaching wasn't really for me, but what else could I do? (The answer is: a lot. There was a lot I could have been doing differently)
So going into the fall of 2008 I was pretty miserable. I was far from God. I didn't know what to do with my life. I was in an unGodly dating relationship. So despite the Phillies being on their way to a World Series win, life was pretty empty.
Then Mark Driscoll began his sermon series on Song of Solomon, titled, "The Peasant Princess." I had been interested in Driscoll for some time and had listened to him on and off. I don't think I had yet read any of his books, but had certainly seen posts or articles from him.
God used this sermon series to pull me out of darkness and bring me to light.
Driscoll's teaching, as always, was blunt. As a pretty pathetic twenty-something male living at mommy and daddy's house, his words often cut. But it was a good cut. Like popping a blister or removing a splinter. It hurts, but you know, you know, that once it's done the healing can begin. I studied a book of the Bible like I had never done before as Pastor Mark went through a text I was unfamiliar with. Part of this series included him and his wife taking the stage at the end of message and answering questions via text and email that came in during the message. One question was eerily familiar.
Someone explained that he had been in a dating relationship for some time and that he was having a sexual relationship with the girl and he was unable to stop. He didn't see a future with the girl because he believed they were unable to be Christlike. What should he do?
Pastor Mark's response: Break up.
Blunt. Cutting. Correct.
What could I say to this? It's pretty sound advice for a situation I found myself in. With this teaching in mind, shortly thereafter I broke off my relationship. That was late January 2009. Shortly after I applied to graduate school to earn a degree working in higher education, an idea I had been kicking around for a couple years, but never found the courage to do. My post-college depression was finally ending after nearly three years.
I didn't realize it at the time, but I gave a little too much credit to Mark Driscoll and not enough credit to God. I wouldn't say that God worked in my life, I would say Pastor Mark did. So instead of worshiping God that much more for pursuing me, I placed Pastor Mark on a pedestal. One pretty high up
So I defended Pastor Mark in everything. He's overly aggressive? Some don't respond to subtlety. He needs to stop screaming? Sometimes that's the only way people will hear. He's offensive? Hey, truth hurts. And while I still see most of his methods as being acceptable, they do tend to lead to something not often acknowledged enough in our society: pride.
Once pride enters the scene anything can happen. Because pride takes down the first few lines of defense against Satan. First, we ignore John the Baptist's example of lessening ourselves and exalting Christ. And Second, we trust ourselves over those around us who are to hold us accountable. If we listen to ourselves instead of God, if we listen to ourselves instead of God's word, if we listen to ourselves instead of our brothers and sisters in Christ, Satan has us exactly where he wants us: Looking inward instead of Heavenward.
So now here we are. For the past decade or so most people have been trying to do one of three things in response to Driscoll: 1) Take him down, 2) Warn him, or 3) Defend him at all costs.
The first camp are made up mostly of atheists or very liberal Christians. Being based in Seattle, Driscoll had more than a few people trying to take him down. For them, it wasn't just Pastor Mark they were opposed to, they were opposed to Christ.
I fell into the third camp. I defended Pastor Mark against all criticism. And while I thought I was just defending him from the first group of people, I was also ignoring the second group.
You see, the second group had it right. They weren't trying to destroy him. They were trying to rebuke him in a loving way. It wasn't his teachings that were wrong, it was him. You see, as difficult as it may be for 2008 Tony to realize, Driscoll is a sinful man like any of us. Even if he leads thousands to Christ, he needs God's grace as much as anyone. And those loving warnings over the years were drowned out until they were screaming sirens. And much like leaving the dead battery in the smoke detector, once the fire engine sirens wake you, it might be too late.
For Pastor Mark it's not too late. He's decided to step away for six weeks and let the board review charges against him. In addition, Paul Tripp has given a very loving, but very direct insight of the culture of Mars Hill leadership that will hopefully go a long way to help resolving the situation. This will only work, though, if the elders seek God in all of this. Because showing love to Mars Hill Church, to the Church, and to Pastor Mark may not look like love. It may require Pastor Mark stepping away for a longer time period. In fact, a "leaked" letter suggests this might be the right course of action.
Meanwhile, I've learned a couple things about myself.
First, I'm the kind of guy who places others on pedestals regularly. Whether it's Rand Paul, Matt Walsh, Paul Tripp, or someone else, I get excited about someone and what they stand for, and then they can do no wrong. I start reading their op-eds before I read the Bible. I look at their blog posts before I read Biblical commentary. I listen to their podcasts before I pray. And while these individuals may express great ideas and be solid role models, a pedestal is a terrible place to put them. They are not infallible. I need to be wary of celebrity Christians. Fame, like money, isn't a bad thing. Neither are evil. But once you start seeking them them instead of seeking Christ, humility is out and pride is in. I don't know how many of our celebrity pastors sought out fame and how many had fame thrusted upon them while trying to glorify Christ. But in our age it's so much easier to be famous for anything, that it's a lot more tempting to use the pulpit to increase oneself instead of Christ. You can almost track history based on individuals who are renowned for preaching the gospel.
16th century: Calvin, Luther, Simons, and Ignatius
17th century: Arminius and Fox
18th century: Edwards, Wesley, and Whitfield
19th century: Hodge, Kierkegaard, and Spurgeon
20th century (early to mid): Chesterton, Lewis, Graham, and Packer
Yet we then come to the late 20th century through today. A time when the internet and social media allows individuals to share every idea they ever had with the entire world in a split second. And while this allows us to share the gospel in new ways with countless people, it also creates celebrities out of people meant to be vessels.
After you read this sentence, close your eyes and take ten seconds to rattle off all the preachers/theologians you can think of...
Here's who I came up with: Piper, Driscoll, Chan, Chandler, DeYoung, Platt, Groeschel, Stanley, Hybels, Warren, Bell, McKinley, Carson, Keller, Mohler, Tripp, Sproul...
See my point? These are folks from just the past 15 years who have gained followings for preaching the gospel (or something resembling the gospel in Bell's case). It's great to base a career of of preaching the Good News, but should someone be rich and famous for doing so? The matter of wealth will have to be reconciled between God and that individual, and I think the matter of fame will be as well. Because only God and that individual knows the heart, and if the heart is proclaiming the Gospel to glorify God's kingdom or to receive something in return. And again, it's not that I think these individuals above entered ministry for any reason other than to glorify God, but after the kudos and dollars start rolling in, it has to be difficult to not enjoy it too much.
The second thing I've learned about myself is that I'm very prideful. You see I have listened to Pastor Mark's sermons, so I know his heart better than you. Whatever you say isn't as informed or as smart as what I say.
Scary stuff. Over the past few weeks I've been discussing Calvinism, specifically the book Five Points by John Piper, through email and facebook with friends. I don't really buy the whole Calvinism thing. Then again I don't really buy the whole Arminianism thing either. Still, I think I've had a few good counterarguments and questions to what I've read, but I've realized I've been demonstrating pride and arrogance in how I've been responding. It's hard to seek God when I'm looking at myself.
I should make sure that I listen when people whom I know love God with all their heart have something to say that differs from what I think. I might still disagree, but instead of speaking over them or planning my next rebuttal, I need to hear what they have to say. And of course, hold it up against God's word.
I still love Mark Driscoll and will continue reading his books and listening to old messages I never got around to. He's incredibly knowledgable and I believe he deeply loves Christ. If things were as bad as many said it was, he needs to take an extended break from vocational ministry. I hope he spends time with his family, reads books, builds a house in an impoverished country, picks up a new hobby, and prays for a deeper love of Christ and a deeper love of people. Maybe I'm just protecting him again at all costs, but I truly hope we see more of him in the future. And through that, we see more of Him.
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